New stitches / Old bitches

I’m going to make a new scarf. I bought the yarn because the texture looked oh-so-cool and reminded me of a jacket my dad had when I was a kid. But I need a new stitch, something I haven’t done a million times, something worthy of the yarn. So, I went looking. I haven’t found the stitch I crave, but I did find these:

Ugly damn shirt

I need to file this under “carnivorous clothing.” Seriously. doesn’t it look like it’s eating that poor child? Yea, your child really wants to wear crap like this. Can you say, “kill Mama in her sleep?”

Then there’s this little gem:

Ugly shirt number 2

Yea, the eighties called. They want their fugly clothes back. How much meth did they have to give that model just to get her into that thing?

And last but not least, what someone has dubbed the “muppet jacket.”

Kee-rist! This is out and out birth control. If you don’t think so, strap ten dead muppets to your back and see if you can get laid. Eeeeeewwww!

On that note, I am off to find myself the perfect stitch for one totally organic, overly embellished, textured to the teeth scarf.



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